What’s your story?

Everyone has a story…

Everyone needs a story…

Why do I share my story with you?

Stories are mesmerizing.  They’re hypnotic.  They engage your audience’s attention and they create a bond between you and the listener?

I remember when I was in university, a good friend of mine Steve had sooooooo much enthusiasm and energy, he would always draw a crowd near him at any party.

I mean always.

Have you ever known someone, like Steve, who is usually the center of attention at a party?  Where people encircle him as he is telling a story with a great deal of gusto, passion, and sometimes with somberness?

Stories are important.  And you can use stories to create a bond with your audience.

In fact you need to start much of what you do with the relationship in mind when you work with a new or prospective client.  And you especially need to focus on cultivating the relationship you have with your existing clientele.

Why do you need to focus with the relationship first in mind?

Here’s a couple of sayings worth mentioning:

  • “People buy from folks they know and trust.”
  • Caesar Kavadoy Jr., sales wunderkind and partner of the sales strategy firm Sales Artists (www.salesartists.com) says “Sales and relationships are the same thing”

How can you use stories to build rapport with someone and get them to trust and like you?

It depends on the context.  For example, when I taught students they and often the parents would want to know my story.

“Tony, how did you get into music?”

“Well one day in third grade our music teacher, Mrs. Gangler not knowing what to do since the Christmas pageant was over and trying to fill in time to keep a bunch of rambunctious ADHD kids occupied popped in this movie about Mozart called ‘Amadeus’ into the VCR (remember VHS tapes?).  School periods were 50 minutes back then and it took us three or four classes to watch the whole movie, so it took us about a month to finish the movie.  But by the time we were done with the movie, I was absolutely hooked.  I mean I had to become like this eccentric Mozart guy.”

“Wait wasn’t Mozart a composer?  How did you end up playing guitar?”

“Well I took keyboard lessons for a year but I was kind of getting bored and the teacher was this guy who wasn’t ‘hip with the kids’ so to speak and I really wanted to play the stuff that was on the radio and on MTV and he really wanted me to play this stuff I could have cared less for.  So I ended up kind of upsetting him, and one day he kind of, well ok he up and quit and called my folks and said ‘your son is a pain in the ass.’

“Well about a month later, I was like ‘Dad you know, I really want to play a guitar’ and my Dad would have none of it.  I was persuasive and persistent and he finally relented and agreed to buy me a cheap ‘guitar kit’, OK really a POS- one step above Radio Shack really – Matrix amplifier and a POS guitar – a Hohner Rockwood – there’s a reason why Hohner should stick to making harmonica’s.  Anyways, at this point I knew I had found my instrument, and I took lessons for the next few years.”

But what if you can’t use stories right away?  How do you build rapport with someone quickly?

I’m glad you asked…

That will be the subject of a future post , and it’ll blow your mind

. . . Stay tuned.

Tony Goicochea

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